{Debate} The Assassin's Curse

Oceana and Lisbeth share different opinions of the book THE ASSASSIN'S CURSE by Cassandra Rose Clarke. Here, they battle it out over a Skype conversation, with Oceana attacking and Lisbeth defending. Read Oceana's negative review and Lisbeth's positive review before you continue.

Friendships are shattered.

Lies are revealed.

Romance seizes.

Welcome... to the debate.

Oceana: First of all, let's begin with Ananna, Miss Pineapple. HOW THE FUCK DO YOU EVEN STAND HER. How do you like her?

Lisbeth: Well, let's keep in mind that I read this a long time ago. I don't know if I'll still love her as much. But I loved her attitude more than everything. Even though she spent most of her time protecting Naji, at least she wasn't idiotic.

Oceana: What about this water nymph bitch? Didn't you think it was unfair that she had no personality, and her only purpose was to make Miss Pineapple jealous?

Lisbeth: I completely agree with you there. The girl's only purpose was to make Pineapple - I mean Ananna - jealous. That really ticked me off. She's basically that ex-girlfriend in every highschool drama.

Oceana: NAJI. Bitch, I think you're sexist because you hate spineless heroines, but Naji is adorable to you even though he's a damso-in-distress.

Lisbeth: This is where it's sadly going to a very uneventful and boring fight to the death. I was being hopelessly sexist.

Oceana: I TOLD YOU. I TOLD YOU.

Lisbeth: He's uterly spineless (and I'll be murdered by Zuz for saying this). I still think he's adorable in the same way you can say that Daemon is sexy.

Oceana: YEAH, BECAUSE DAEMON ISN'T A BIG BABY. Naji's like SAVEEEE MEEEE, PROTECT ME, HIDE ME FROM THE EVIL

Lisbeth: How do you account for the fact that Daemon is a huuuge asshole? Huh? He's insufferable.

Oceana: I never liked him while he was an asshole. Plus, he changed - and it's the same cocky confidence that YOU LIKE  IN DEAN AND THE OTHER DAMON.

Lisbeth: Damon is an asshole, and so is Daemon. There is no doubt about that. He's despicable at times but he's pitiful in the same way you feel bad and want to hug Loki in Avengers even though he's insane. Dean isn't an asshole. End of story.

Oceana: Yeah, he's a gigantic dick. I never said I liked him while he was being an ass to Katy. And I never said Dean was an asshole - I LOVE HIM - I said he was confident and had... *shudders* SWAG.

Lisbeth: Did you just say... swag?

Oceana: *cringes*

Lisbeth: Wow, ok... time for me to interrogate you. Did you truly not find the writing at times very vivid? I'm not saying the writing is fantastic and the best I've ever seen. It's not but I have to say that if you disregard the accent, the writing is very immersive.

Oceana: Yes. Yes I did. It could have been a lot better, and it's DEFINITELY better than a lot of self-pub written out there, but I found it... Average.

Lisbeth: One of my favorite things about THE ASSASSIN'S CURSE was the assassin and blood magic concept. Was this idea completely horrible to you like the rest of the plot?

Oceana: No! I loved the idea of the plot! It sounded amazing. But it was so disappointing.

Lisbeth: Yeah, yeah. I get it. You hate-y.

Oceana: *scowls*

Lisbeth: *scowls back*

Oceana: What about the romance? Please, explain THAT.

Lisbeth: Darling, you know I love you but I don't think you got the point of the romance.

Oceana: The blurb LIED TO ME.

Lisbeth: The whole point of the romance was the lack of romance. It was slow and hardly there but you could tell it was there. And what, pray tell did the blurb say?

Oceana: "... And the growing romantic tension between them." LIKE I SAID BEFORE. I HAVE MORE SEXUAL TENSION WITH MY FISH.

Lisbeth: I understand that you find it impossible to read a book without any romance, but they are there. As I said, the blurb is bad - very bad.

Oceana: Dude, I can read a book without romance. But it LIED. Don't you dare fucking claim there's romance when he can't tear his eyes off that nymph.

Lisbeth: Wait - didn't you tell me how you find it hard to read a romance free book? How it felt like something was missing? There's romance even though it's hardly there. That's what sequels are for.

Oceana: Ummm. I never said that...

Lisbeth: Would you like me to go and look through our DMs to find it?

Oceana: Oh yeah? Find it.

Lisbeth: How far can you search? In Twitter direct messages.

Oceana: Haha, I can't. I clear my history. Improvise, I guess.

Lisbeth: "I seriously can't read books without romance. It's physically painful." October 5th.

Oceana: That's the best you can come up with? That doesn't sound like me at all. *huffs*

Lisbeth: FINE. I'll do better. *grumbles* Bitch.

Oceana: LOVE YOU TOO.

Lisbeth: "Me no read books wit out kissy kissy." That's what you said.

Oceana: I was not aware that I was a ghetto baby...

Lisbeth: I'm improvising.

Oceana: Ghetto caveman baby, pardon me.

Lisbeth: "I shall not read a single book without sexy times". Direct quote guys.

Oceana: NOPE.

Lisbeth: PICKY BITCH

Oceana: Closer with the sexy-times part, though.

Lisbeth: "I totally can't read a book without sexy times."

Oceana: NO. How about, "I miss my freaking sexy times. I need some TENSIONNNNNNN."

Lisbeth: "Books without sexytimes are soooo boring. DEAN DAMON"

Oceana: I didn't even know Dean in October, dumbass.

Lisbeth: Oh ok... "I lurv sexy times in my books like say DELENA mmmmm hot"

Oceana: NO NO NO NO NOPE.

Lisbeth: I'm trying my best here! How about, "Delena. It's hot and tensiony. Romances should be like that."

Oceana: ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NOT

Lisbeth: WHY NOT IT'S TOTALLY YOU

Oceana: ANNA AND THE FRENCH KISS is so not hot and steamy and it's one of my favorites. I DON'T EVEN SOUND LIKE THAT

Lisbeth: I THINK I KNOW WHAT YOU SOUND LIKE

Oceana: Forget this. You can't pretend to be me, bitch.

Lisbeth: DAMN YOU.

Oceana: I guess we're done here. See you later, guys. *ducks* STOP THROWING PLATES BABE