{Review} Slated by Terri Terry

Title: Slated

Author: Terri Terry

Format: Library, hardcover

Publisher: Orchard Books

Date Read: July 12th through July 16th

Rating: ✭

DNF Review

Kyla’s memory has been erased,
her personality wiped blank,
her memories lost for ever.

She’s been Slated.

The government claims she was a terrorist and that they are giving her a second chance - as long as she plays by their rules. But echoes of the past whisper in Kyla’s mind. Someone is lying to her, and nothing is as it seems. Who can she trust in her search for the truth?

Slated is one of those books that sound great in theory but in actuality, it didn't end up that great. Reading the blurb made me extremely excited but the book however is the exact opposite. While there were many flaws to the novel, the major one was the fact that the book was written in the first person.

To understand why this was a monumental fail on the author's part, you need to know something about the main character. Thankfully, this won't be a very long interruption because there isn't much to say about her.

Kayla is the main character who's traumatic backstory includes brain wash and stuff. Yeah, poor baby, .ect. Someone however forgot to tell Kayla that brainwash does not mean you become akin to say a robot or a door.

Actually no, there are robots and doors with more energy and vigour than her. She's worse. 

Kayla is seriously the most colorless, commonplace, dead, drab, drudging, dull, flat, ho hum, humdrum, insipid, interminable, irksome, lifeless, monotonous, moth-eaten, mundane, nothing, nowhere, platitudinous, plebeian, prosaic, repetitious, routine, spiritless, stale, stereotyped, stodgy, stuffy, stupid, tame, tedious, threadbare, tiresome, tiring, trite, unexciting, uninteresting, unvaried, vapid, wearisome (no I did not just copy the thesaurus entry for boring... heh) character out there. 

Consequently, the writing is the driest monotone out there and there is pretty much absolutely nothing to keep you going. Like, how am I supposed to stay awake interested when much of the book sounds like this:

‘Interesting choice for breakfast,’ Amy says, then sits up and yawns. ‘Are you an early bird?’
I look at her blankly.
‘Do you always wake up early?’
I consider. ‘I think so,’ I say, finally. ‘Though that could be because at the hospital you have no choice.’
‘Oh, I remember that. Horrible morning buzzer. Breakfast by six.’ She shudders.
‘Want one?’ I hold out the box.
‘Oooh, tempting. Maybe later, when I’m more awake. What is that?’ She points at the folder in my other hand.
‘My drawings.’
‘Can I see?’
I hesitate. I rarely show them to anyone, though Dr Lysander insisted on checking through them now and then.
‘You don’t have to show me if you don’t want to.’
I sit next to her and open the folder, pull out the sheets of paper. Amy exclaims at the one on top. A self-portrait. Me, but different: half as I am in the mirror, the other half skin missing, eyeball hanging from an empty socket.
‘May I?’ she holds out a hand, and I pass the drawing to her.
But that wasn’t on top before. I start flipping through the sheets.
‘You’re so good, this is amazing.’

This is an actual conversation from the book, by the way. This is actually how she sounds throughout the book.

Not even the plot could keep me going because honestly, it's extremely flat and boring. There isn't enough to really keep the story moving because all and any plot twists were easily guessed.

The author gives away all the clues in such a way that it becomes incredibly obvious. While sometimes hiding things in plain sight is great, it doesn't always work. Especially when you have little to no skill. World building is what readers look for and they remember it. If you put a crucial bit of information right in front of their eyes, they'll see it.

The whole cast of characters were bland, to put it lightly. They had little to no personality or distinguishing characteristics. Everyone talked in the same monotone as Kayla, except for one of the characters who had the bubbly manic pixie personality which is less of a personality and more of a stereotype, if you get what I mean.

So, the boring plot/characters and terrible writing joined forces to create one of the most dull stories I have ever read. I would not recommend this book to anyone and would advise you all to stay approximately 50 feet away at all times.

Lisbeth is an American teenager who enjoys blowing shit up in videogames and discussing decapitation in great detail. She's also obsessed with Oceana, but you're not supposed to know that.

{Review} Walking Disaster by Jamie McGuire

Title: Walking Disaster
Author: Jamie McGuire
Format: e-book
Publisher: Atria Books
Release date: April 2, 2013
Date Read: April 29, 2013 - May 27, 2013
Rating: ✭

Finally, the highly anticipated follow-up to the New York Times bestseller Beautiful Disaster.

Can you love someone too much?

Travis Maddox learned two things from his mother before she died: Love hard. Fight harder.

In Walking Disaster, the life of Travis is full of fast women, underground gambling, and violence. But just when he thinks he is invincible, Abby Abernathy brings him to his knees.

Every story has two sides. In Beautiful Disaster, Abby had her say. Now it’s time to see the story through Travis’s eyes.

for WALKING DISASTER

Can you despise a book but still enjoy reading it?

That's a question I've often asked myself while reading Jamie McGuire's two DISASTER books, because while I spend most of my time wanting to throw them off cliffs, they're also very readable and engrossing. It's not quite a train wreck that you can't look away from - more like staring at a naked man peeing in a plaza fountain.



Wait, that's not particularly enjoyable.

Actually, ignore that. I'm drunk. A little. Not really. Not at all. I've just had a rough fucking week, okay?

McGuire isn't going to win any awards for her gorgeous writing style; that's for sure. It's really quite meh; on a scale of E.L. James to Laini Taylor. There's not a lot to say about it, besides being endlessly average.

WALKING DISASTER is angst. Really. The whole story is just a bunch of angst and slut-shaming and bagging vultures. Oh, I should probably explain. Travis calls every woman (except for Abby) who shows an interest in him a vulture, and instead of saying "we had sex" or "we banged" or even "we fucked", he goes for the charming "I bagged her". I mean, there's also the I-murdered-her-and-stuck-her-in-a-body-bag kind of bagged, but I really wouldn't put it past him.

If you want a short version of WALKING DISASTER, here it is: Travis wants to sleep with Abby. Abby says no. Abby sleeps in Travis's bed and does a bunch of questionable things that make Travis think they're more than friends, but no. Abby goes out with a guy named Parker sometimes. Travis beats the shit out of people. Angst. Angst. Angst. They get together. They break up. Travis bangs and throws out women like trash. Wash, rinse, repeat. Gangsters and Vegas and tattoos and really unrealistic fighting. Babies and a stupid ending.

The story of Travis and Abby is one of complete and utter chaos. At times, Abby could be a strong, likable female character who wouldn't take any shit from Travis. But more often, she submitted to Travis' controlling demands and partook in the slut-shaming of the very women she had often defended. I felt like McGuire couldn't get a grip on Abby; her personalities and actions were so different. I had a hard time believing it was all the same character. She's pretty much the definition of hot-and-cold.

If I ever had the chance to speak to Travis - to tell him only one sentence - it'd be kind of obvious, seeing as my hatred for him knows no bounds.



Okay, I know Petyr Baelish probably isn't the best person to tell someone to go fuck themselves, but give me a break.

Travis is literally one of the worst male characters I've ever encountered in all my years of reading. Actually, he's probably in the top five. I genuinely cannot understand how anyone could have an ounce of respect, admiration, or love for this violent, awful misogynist. He has no sense of self-control or humiliation, and someone needs to SIT HIM THE FUCK DOWN AND TELL HIM TO GET OFF HIS HIGH HORSE. He tore apart an entire bedroom, smashed furniture - just because Abby had left without telling him. 

Travis is a fucking psychopath. A PSYCHOPATH, NOT A HIGH-FUNCTIONING SOCIOPATH.



He treats everyone - even the people he supposedly respects - horribly, and he's more of a mother to Abby than a boyfriend. 

Abby, you can't wear that.

Abby, you can't do that.

Abby, you can't be a fucking person and stand up for yourself.

I was convinced that by the end of WALKING DISASTER, he would've went to the veterinarian and gotten Abby a microchip so he could always find her if she ran away. He reduced her to his pet. 

By the way, since when does the FBI recruit unstable, uncontrollable, dangerous men?



Answer: since Will Graham but please just ignore that part he's my baby and he needs love and medical care and teddy bears

I'm talking about Travis. Travis begins working for the FBI. It's funny, I think, because in a lot of new adult books I read, the main characters end up successful from careers that are not suited for them at all. Kind of a "fuck it, let's make the male love interest into a gang-busting government worker!" for NO REASON AT ALL.

I don't think there is a single character in WALKING DISASTER that I enjoyed completely. Hell, the only person I didn't want to strangle was . . . oh, wait.

No one.

America, Abby's best friend, could be really smart at times (like when she slapped some common sense into Abby and told her to stay away from Travis) but she also shipped them and encouraged them to get back together, even after witnessing all the shit Travis had put Abby through. Her boyfriend, Shepley, Travis' cousin, is also annoying as hell. Even Parker, supposedly the 'nice guy' and Abby's boyfriend, was a disrespectful asshole at times. To be fair, I'd take Parker over Travis any day, but still. 

I can count, with one hand, the amount of women who weren't 'sluts', 'whores', 'vultures', or 'skanks' by the definitions of every fucking person in this book. With the exception of Travis' mother in the beginning, and Kara, Abby's other roommate, every woman in WALKING DISASTER was sexualized. Not even Travis' bartender friend, who he had no desire to sleep with, was safe from his frat brother's attentions.

So, basically, this book was shit and if I write any more, I'm going to get incredibly frustrated and end up breaking someone's face. This whole book felt like it was McGuire's subtle-but-not-subtle-enough response to her critics, defending every negative thing we had to say.

Oceana is a French-blooded teenager who enjoys stalking British boys and asking them to marry her. She was diagnosed with severe fangirl disorder in 2011. Able to curse like a sailor with an angelic voice.

{Review} Ink by Amanda Sun

Title: Ink

Author: Amanda Sun

Format: Netgalley egalley

Publisher: Harlequin Teen

Release date: June 25th, 2013

Date Read: April 10th through 12th 2013

Rating: ✭

I looked down at the paper, still touching the tip of my shoe. I reached for it, flipping the page over to look. 

Scrawls of ink outlined a drawing of a girl lying on a bench.

A sick feeling started to twist in my stomach, like motion sickness.

And then the girl in the drawing turned her head, and her inky eyes glared straight into mine.

On the heels of a family tragedy, the last thing Katie Greene wants to do is move halfway across the world. Stuck with her aunt in Shizuoka, Japan, Katie feels lost. Alone. She doesn’t know the language, she can barely hold a pair of chopsticks, and she can’t seem to get the hang of taking her shoes off whenever she enters a building.

Then there’s gorgeous but aloof Tomohiro, star of the school’s kendo team. How did he really get the scar on his arm? Katie isn’t prepared for the answer. But when she sees the things he draws start moving, there’s no denying the truth: Tomo has a connection to the ancient gods of Japan, and being near Katie is causing his abilities to spiral out of control. If the wrong people notice, they'll both be targets.

Katie never wanted to move to Japan—now she may not make it out of the country alive.

I've been really wondering if I read the right book or if I somehow got sent a different book on accident. It's seems like the most logical explanation for this failure I read. The real INK just can't be this bad, right? 

... right?


The reason INK was so bad was because it was so average. There wasn't anything unique about it other than the premise of paper gods. It's a very standard YA paranormal romance that deviates very little from the set of "rules" that much of the genre follows. Y'know, this stuff:

- someone moves into new town

This step is a must because how else are you going to find an awesome, mysterious guy that the heroine doesn't know? While the love interest can be the one to move to the town, it is much preferred to have the heroine move as to add to her outcasty, uniqueness. durh

- girl has trouble at school

This is also a must. The girl must have enemies so add a popular girl and get some stupid and silly reason for her to utterly despise the main character. Sometimes there isn't even a reason really.

- "best friends"

These "best friends" usually have zero personality and are used as filler material. There isn't any real reason for them other than nice and cheap plot and character development. Often they are used to push the heroine into the love interest.

- the heroine must bump into a hot paranormal dude

The sad part about this is that when I say, "bumps into", I mean quite literally as the heroine usually falls into the love interest. I'm quite certain that every one of these guys have the power to somehow make the force of gravity stronger on these heroines. 

---

INK fits into every one of these categories and more. It's like Amanda Sun had a pile of clichés and very poorly stitched them together. The main character, Katie, not only moves into a new town, she moves into a new country and continent. 

Wow, way to take that nice and far. 

While you can't often escape clichés and tropes, I really hate when the entire book is such walking cliché like INK is. There isn't a single point that makes this book even sort of redeemable unless you count the fact that it's set in Japan. Katie is an extremely annoying character and the romance is so insta that you just need to add water.

Katie is, for the most part, a bland Mary Sue. She can't lie at all. This character point is actually really depressing if you count the fact that it's one of the first things that come to mind when I think of her. She loves to endanger her life - y'know because you obviously it's a perfect idea to stalk a guy who supposedly beat up his best friend. She often morphs into possessive stalker a la Lucinda Price. She's also got a habit of being incredibly overdramatic:

I stared at him, my hands shaking. I'd been standing until then, but my legs buckled under me and I sank down to my knees beside him. I opened and closed my mouth, but no sound.- 21% in ARC

What elicited this response? He told her that his mother is dead. She was having a completely normal conversation and then all of a sudden, she just falls to the ground. Guys, read the passage in a really dramatic voice and picture that. It's so hilarious.

Tomo is pretty bland as a character. He's supposed to be this awesome hunk with an equally awesome personality but tbh, he's more of a hot guy than anything else. He doesn't have any qualities that jump out at you, whether they are positive or negative. He's a nonentity that I really don't care about.
The one fairly redeeming quality that saved this book from a disgusted DNF was the setting and the lore. I am the biggest lore sucker there ever was. I live for it. The lore behind the paranormal aspect of INK was interesting enough to keep me reading. 

If Sun had focused on this aspect instead of the romance, the book would have been so much better and actually would have lived up to the hype.

The writing was fairly average for the most part but I really enjoyed the sequences that described Tomo's art. They really felt like what I thought the book would be like. 

This book has so much wasted potential that it almost makes me sad to think about it. It could have been so amazing if it weren't for the averageness of the story, it could have gotten a much higher rating. I cannot recommend this to anyone and I won't be reading the sequel.

Lisbeth is an American teenager who enjoys blowing shit up in videogames and discussing decapitation in great detail. She's also obsessed with Oceana, but you're not supposed to know that.

{Review} Various Positions by Martha Schabas

Title: Various Positions
Author: Martha Schabas
Format: NetGalley ebook ARC
Publisher:  Farrar, Straus and Giroux
Release date: February 14, 2012
Date Read: March 17, 2013
Rating: ✭

Trapped between the hormone-driven world of her friends and the discontent of her dysfunctional family, fourteen-year-old Georgia is only completely at ease when she's dancing. When she is accepted into Canada's preeminent ballet school, Georgia thinks it is the perfect escape. Artistic Director Roderick Allen singles her out as a star, subjecting her to increasingly intensive training, and Georgia obsesses about becoming the perfect, disciplined student. But as she spends more and more time with Roderick, it's not so clear exactly what their relationship means. Is he her teacher and mentor, or is there something more? These blurred lines will threaten both Roderick's future at the academy and Georgia's ambitions as a ballerina.

For VARIOUS POSITIONS

Dude, that was a really weird book.

Weird in the way that you're going to remember it, but not in a good way.

VARIOUS POSITIONS I'd love to see you try to come up with a dirtier title than that shit is the story of fourteen year old Georgia and her adventures in seducing her ballet teacher, copying porn poses, acting like an idiot, and hurting everyone around her.

I mean, it sounds about right to me.

VARIOUS POSITIONS had a really strange plot, because it wasn't about the ballet. It was about a seriously fucked-up girl from a fucked-up family living in a fucked-up world.

Sounds like me.

I didn't enjoy the odd plot. I had high hopes when I first read the blurb, mostly because it was being compared to The Black Swan for teenagers (which I loved). However, it wasn't what I was looking for at all.

I understand that VARIOUS POSITIONS is about a girl experimenting with her own sexuality, but as someone Georgia's age and ten times more perverted (hey, I was raised in a French family), her sexual thoughts were downright disturbing.

She gives forty-year old men 'suggestive faces', tries kissing her ballet teacher Roderick, and can't look a single person in the eye without imagining herself having sex with them. 

I mean, I don't even do that and that's saying something.

The writing, I had to admit, was beautiful. Schabas is a very talented writer, because the style was quite beautiful. However, the plot and characters dragged her debut novel down. VARIOUS POSITIONS never got dull, but it was never quite absorbing, either.

I hated every single character in VARIOUS POSITIONS. There was not one redeemable character that I grew to love, and most of all, I hated Georgia.

Georgia screws up massively, and then blames everyone but herself. She constantly shames the more 'sexual' girls for not acting as virginal as she does. By sexual, I mean swiping on some lipgloss. That's right: Georgia mentally taunts the other girls and makes fun of them for wearing an ounce of makeup.

Bitch, when I go shopping, I do go for the shirt that makes my boobs look big! And I do like wearing makeup, because it makes me look better. I feel more confident with it, and as a result I TURN INTO A FUCKING BADASS.

And I have plenty of 'self-respect', so fuck you.

Georgia doesn't take responsibility for her actions, and her age is not an excuse to act like a fucking moron. Georgia puts her friend in the hospital for anorexia with her seriously flawed 'diet' and doesn't think about it twice. She has consensual, willing unprotected sex with another guy and suddenly gets up, calls him names, and acts like he's raped her. Georgia believes that her ballet teacher Roderick lusts after her (though there are absolutely no indications) and tries to make out with him. Even though he pushes her away immediately, he gets in huge trouble, and is labeled a pedophile and a predator.

I'm probably more immature than Georgia, but I know not to take naked pictures of myself and send them to Roderick.



I MEAN SERIOUSLY DOES SHE HAVE HALF A BRAIN

Roderick is an asshole and a dickface, but he doesn't deserve what he got. Even though Georgia promised to tell everyone he wasn't the one that kissed her, his reputation will be forever tainted, and Georgia will just be that poor girl who made a little mistake and got to go to another new.

It's so unfair and I nearly threw the book across the room.

All of Georgia's 'friends' are bitchy, one-dimensional, and unlikable. Georgia's parents seriously screwed her up, and their relationship with her was strained and sad. I despised them all, really.

One last thing, though. A ballet dancer in VARIOUS POSITIONS was considered chubby because of her thighs, but by ballet standards, 'chubby legs' are probably more thin than mine are ever going to get.

*looks down at thighs guilty* I should've probably written this review on the treadmill, huh?

Even though I wasn't a fan of this book, Schabas sure knows how to reel us in and keep us interested. I'll probably read future books of hers.

Oceana is a French-blooded teenager who enjoys stalking British boys and asking them to marry her. She was diagnosed with severe fangirl disorder in 2011. Able to curse like a sailor with an angelic voice.

{Review} An Infidel in Paradise by S. J. Laidlaw

Title: An Infidel in Paradise
Author: S. J. Laidlaw
Format: NetGalley e-book ARC
Publisher: Harlequin Teen
Release date: February 12 2013
Date Read: February 5 2013
Rating: ✭

Set in Pakistan, this is the story of a teen girl living with her mother and siblings in a diplomatic compound. As if getting used to another new country and set of customs and friends isn't enough, she must cope with an increasingly tense political situation that becomes dangerous with alarming speed. Her life and those of her sister and brother depend on her resourcefulness and the unexpected help of an enigmatic Muslim classmate.

Where do I start? AN INFIDEL IN PARADISE is about a girl who has moved to Pakistan and has to adjust to living there which basically means it's a high school drama set in well, Pakistan. That's really at AN INFIDEL IN PARADISE was - a high school drama. The plot promises a YA political thriller. I mean, it actually says this in the plot summary:

an increasingly tense political situation that becomes dangerous with alarming speed

But then again it says this in the plot summary...

an enigmatic Muslim classmate

And everyone knows when a plot has the word "enigmatic" in it, it's usually about a romance not what it actually promises. In fact, I don't think I've read one books with the word "enigmatic" in the plot summary that didn't have romance as the main focus... (seriously guys, if you can find one non-romance focused book with the word "enigmatic" in the summary, I'll send you some chocolate).

My biggest overall complaint is the simple fact that AN INFIDEL IN PARADISE glorified cheating. I don't think this is the intent since the main character does not end up with the love interest but even so, it was there. 

The love interest, Mustapha, is engaged to Aisha. Emma comes in and starts flirting with Mustapha, trying to get him to leave Aisha (who he admitted to loving). That's what the main story is about. Aisha is portrayed as the jealous bitch even though she's just trying to get Emma to stop. Emma even acknowledges that she is flirting with Mustapha but she continues throughout the book.

Cheating is not okay. I don't give a damn if it's because you love her (you don't). Cheating will never be ok. Mustapha is also to blame since he seems to want the best of both worlds, both Aisha and Emma.

Characters

The main character in the novel is where many of my complaints center since she's so infuriating. I really wanted to strangle her around twenty times, which isn't really that much but I restrained myself - a lot. Emma hates every person with boobs really. 

If the girl looks at her the wrong way, she giving her death glares. If a girl dresses a certain way, she has to be an idiot. There's one character where Emma takes one look at her and nicknames her Hip-Hop Barbie. The little adjectives here and there make it very obvious that she thinks that everyone is an idiot to her genius.


Emma seems to think that the world revolves around her. Everyone in her family is mad? Obviously, the only reason they could be annoyed is because of her. I mean, it couldn't be any other reason! 

The other characters were stereotypes. There was the ice queen bitch who hates the main character, the amazing handsome wonderful love interest, the idiot friends who don't know as much as the amazing wonderful main character, the angsty little brother who hates the main character, the understanding teacher, the parent who is like totes annoying and doesn't understand our main character ... I could go on and on.

The only character I'll go over is Aisha, or better known as ice queen (she was seriously called Ice Queen). Aisha was that bitch who takes one look at Emma and WAAHH I HATES YOU AND I WILL MAKE YOUR LIFE MISERABLE 4EVER. 

Except, in this one, I, to an extent agree with that sentiment. Sure, it was weird that she immediately hated Emma but the first time she met Emma, Emma flirted with her fiancé and disrespected Aisha's country. I would hate her too , oh wait I do.

Plot and Writing

Plot

As I said, the plot is very disappointing. The only "political tension" in the book is at say 75% and it's only mentioned a bit before forgotten in favour of the romance. The "political tension" comes back at the very end in an odd and sudden terrorist attack but that's it. 

The summary says that ...her life and those of her sister and brother depend on her resourcefulness and the unexpected help of an enigmatic Muslim classmate. but honestly Emma's life isnot in danger and Mustapha isn't really doing any helping. 

The plot summary is a LIAR.

Writing

The one positive thing in this book is the writing. Though, childish and mediocre at times (well most of the time but who's counting right?), some of the descriptions for the places were truly amazing. I felt like I was right there with Emma at times. That was awesome.

Likes and Dislikes

Likes: 
- Writing

Dislikes:
- Everything else

In conclusion

I really hated AN INFIDEL IN PARADISE and wouldn't recommend it to anyone. 

Lisbeth is an American teenager who enjoys blowing shit up in videogames and discussing decapitation in great detail. She's also obsessed with Oceana, but you're not supposed to know that.

{Review} Last Cut by Wren Handman

Title: Last Cut
Author: Wren Handman
Format: NetGalley e-book ARC
Publisher: James Lorimer & Company 
Release date: April 1st 2013
Date Read: February 3rd 2013
Rating: ✭

Caitlin Myers's greatest ambition is to be a star, and she can outshine anyone at her school. But then Lianne comes to town and starts to give Caitlin a run for her money, even getting top billing in the school play.

So when Caitlin's offered a bit role as the bikini girl in a low-budget slasher flick, she ignores the warning bells (and her parents), lies about her age, and takes the part.

It's not long before Caitlin finds herself out of her element when it comes to bossy directors and experienced film crews. Her only way out is to fess up about her age, but if she does, she'll have to come clean to her parents, her friends, and her boyfriend about the things she's done

Being that first reviewer on Goodreads is a lot of pressure. Well, at least that's what I feel. It's just kind of scary knowing that you're the first out of every person on Goodreads. I don't mean to sound full of myself but it's kind of like I have the opportunity to make or break an author's book.

While I enjoy writing rants about books I hate, there's always this little part of me that says: "This isn't who you are. These aren't the reviews you write". And it's true. When I write rants, I'm bitchy, crude, and honestly, not very good. 

I'll admit it to everyone: I write rants for the views. My rant of FROM ASHES is one of my most liked and commented on reviews of all time and I like that. Who doesn't like the attention? I certainly cannot say I don't like being popular for a few meager moments.

However, I never feel that my purposely ranty-reviews are my favorite or my best. They're just not as good as my other reviews. My favorite review out of all that I've written is actually a favorable review (five stars and all that). 

So, even though this book is definitely among the books I hate, I will not be ranting in this review - or at least I will not be purposely ranty. I will be expressing my honest opinions, which aren't really favorable.

Now, with that out of the way, let's get on to the actual review.

LAST CUT is a book that I normally would never pick up but it was on NetGalley and it's physically impossible for me not to request everything and anything from that site because well it's free and this is me on a day to day basis:

So, I requested it and got approved because everyone loves me there and promptly forgot about it because I do that - a lot. However, I soon remembered it and picked it up. LAST CUT is an extremely fast book to read since it's smaller than my 7-year-old brother's chapter books. 

My main problem was with the MC, as I'll be covering in the next segment. 

Characters

Caitlin Myer isn't the worst heroine I've ever encountered but she definitely is pretty high on my I-really-hate-you list (and yes, I really have one). Caitlin is a pretty generic heroine - for the most part at least. I could go over her "generic qualities" but I'd rather go with the one worded explanation: Mary-Sue.

What I really hated about her was her tendency to slut shaming. If you don't know this about me, I really really hate slut shaming and her overall hate of girls. Caitlin just seems to hate every female that she meets - including her "friends". Some examples for you:

What does she have that I don't? Other than a tiny waist and gigantic breasts. And she acts soinnocent, like she has no idea that her tank top is three sizes too small.

And the second example: 
"Book?"

"Ender's Game..."

..."Didn't you say that if there wasn't a love triangle in it, you weren't interested?"

"That was two years ago," Hannah says defensively and I shrug. She's probably just trying to seem smart for some guy.

Seriously? This is what the whole book was like. I could go on but honestly? It's physically painful to go over these again. The other characters were lifeless and the only real character in this was Caitlin. The other characters really just were there to pamper Caitlin and tell her how amahzing she is.

Plot and Writing

Plot

The plot is basically a caution tale except it was done horribly. The plot to this is basically Caitlin applies for a job in a movie, gets the job but needed to lie about her age, has to take of her shirt for boob shot, people find out she's sixteen and is kicked from the movie, and the ending? Everyone leaves her. I'm serious. The last scene is her boyfriend walking away after Caitlin's friends had walked away. 


I think Handman was trying to say something with this. Maybe it was "don't lie" or something to that key but in the end? It failed terribly. It didn't teach me anything. It didn't do anything except leave me thinking "Did I really waste half an hour reading this?".

Writing

By the 5%, I was sure this was fan fiction or written by a twelve year old. I'm sorry but the writing was atrocious. I really don't think that Wren Handman had an editor because there were so many grammatical errors and poorly phrased sentences (and don't say that's because this is an ARC, it's not - LAST CUT is a republished book since it was originally published August 13th, 2012).

Likes and Dislikes

Likes:

- N/A

Dislikes:

- Characters
- Plot
- Writing

In conclusion

LAST CUT is a really bad book and I do not recommend it to any one.

Lisbeth is an American  teenager who enjoys killing people on videogames and discussing decapitation in great detail. She's also obsessed with Oceana, but you're not supposed to know that.

{Review} From Ashes by Molly McAdams

Title: From Ashes
Author: Molly McAdams
Format: NetGalley e-book
Publisher: William Morrow
Release date: December 11th 2012
Date Read: January 19th - January 20th 2013
Rating: ✭

When Cassidy Jameson's best friend Tyler took her to Texas with him when he left for college, she was expecting his cousin, their new roommate, to be a Stetson-wearing cowboy since his family owned a ranch; not this incredibly gorgeous guy with a husky Southern drawl that seemed to make the world stop whenever she looked at him. Because of her past, she's only ever trusted two men in her life, Tyler and her dad whom passed away when she was six. But there's something about Gage that draws her to him in a way she can't explain, only problem? He's always telling Tyler that he doesn't want Cassidy living there and sees her as nothing more than his little sister.

Gage Carson was excited his cousin Tyler was coming to live with, and go to college with him. When he'd called to ask if he could bring his friend Cassi with him, Gage didn't care. Gage had heard about this mysterious friend since they were kids and felt like he already knew her. Nothing would prepare him for watching her jump out of Ty's Jeep though. Not only was Cassi the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen, but there was something about her that within seconds of meeting her, made Gage want to protect her, and make her his. Too bad Tyler made it a point to remind Gage on a daily basis that he was dating her and she was completely off limits.

For a year and a half, Gage and Cassidy dance around their feelings for each other as Tyler continues to keep them apart; until one day Tyler unknowingly pushes her right into Gage's arms. With Tyler unable to keep lying to them, they finally start a relationship both have been craving since their first meeting. But when an accident and disaster sends her back to Tyler and California, will Cassidy be able to come face to face with the demons from her past to live a life she and Gage deserve; or will the fact that she once again ran to Tyler be the final push that ends Cassidy and Gage for good?

For FROM ASHES

This review rant will not be in normal format, instead it will be in freehand like most of my rants.

I really shouldn't review this book. I really shouldn't. It's just going to make me angry, plus I have other books to review. But, books that make me so angry like FROM ASHES, I need to review, no matter how bad it is for my sanity.

FROM ASHES is pretty much the worst book I have ever read. I know I'm going to say it again and probably will till the end of time but at this time, I cannot imagine a worse book. The only reason I finished this piece of utter shit is because FROM ASHES is the most readable book ever. 

Yes, I know, that makes no sense since I mentioned (once or twice) that I HATE this book but it's true. 

Molly McAdams has succeeded in making a book you hate to love to read (I'm pretty sure that's the first of its kind). I wanted to know what happened next even though I was literally screaming at the book. 

The characters in this book are just terrible. I could go on forever but here is a basic summary:
Cassidy: Cheating, bitchy, judgmental girl who thinks she's better than everyone. One of the main characters whose only problems in life are: trying to decide which guy (out of 5 guys) she loves, handling a real life job, and being unable to have sex 10 times a day.

Gage: Boring, possessive, and bland all describe Gage. Me no like.

Tyler: THIS GUY IS WORSE THAN TRAVIS MADDOX. He is one of the worst love interests - no characters - I've ever encountered. Ever.

The plot of FROM ASHES makes absolutely no sense, at all. It was just terrible. In fact, I will recap the book's plot for your enjoyment/torture. Get ready guys because this is one really, really messed up book.

The books starts off with Cassidy recounting how she's so scared and has so many problems. These problems range from bad to not being bad at all. The worst being her parents abusing her as a kid not being able to decide if she loves Tyler or Gage this week and the least being that she's too pretty.

I know, I know, it's so horrible.

Somehow, these abusive parents allow Cassidy to leave her home and travel to Texas. Note, this is realistic fiction and everyone knows that this is all very plausible. Anyway, she moves to Texas with her hot best friend (but he doesn't have aaanny romantic feeling towards her). There, she meets his even hotter (OMG how is this possible?) cousin Gage.

Let's examine some quotes now.

What with Tyler's possessiveness and all no one even attempted to get close enough to me. Not that it bothered me...

Cassidy says this after stating how Tyler could never like her romantically. Also, how can you be okay with this amount of obsessiveness.

Gage was like a brother to him [Tyler] and Tyler hadn't seen him in a few years, so their sharing an apartment would be good for Ty.

HAHA you can guess how long Tyler thinks of Gage as a brother instead of a rival.

Tyler dropped my hand, only to put his on the small of my back as he led me over to Mr. New [Gage] and the leggy blonde.

You just met Gage and you're already calling his girlfriend a "leggy blonde". 

"I'm Brynn [this is the leggy blonde], Gage's girlfriend." Her eyes narrowed.

Woah, already jealous huh? Now the next few quotes are from Gage's point of view.

All I could think about was closing the distance between us [Gage and Cassidy].

You just met this girl a few hours ago. Slooooww down cowboy.

I was frozen in place, taking in the most beautiful girl I'd ever seen.

DUUDE you met her a few minutes ago.

I couldn't even stop the growl that came from my throat when I saw it [Tyler holding Cassidy's hand].

WHY ARE YOU GROWLING MAN? Staph kthanks.

And yeah, I'm not gonna lie, I'd already pictured her beneath me.

GAGE 

WHAT

THE

FUCK

DUDE

"She's mine Gage, Let's get that clear right now." [said Tyler]

Dude, no. She's not.

"Damn, when you said your cousin was bringing a chick, I wasn't expecting her to be so hot," Jake said.
"Jake, touch her again.... see what fucking happens." [said Gage]

Ok, so Gage is already threatening people to lay off "his woman". At 3%.

How was I already so into this girl that it physically hurt to think of her being with Ty?

Trying to figure that one out myself honestly.

"...she's been cooking for herself since she was six..." [Ty on Cassidy]

Why does the main female character always have to know how to cook and seem to be the only one who does?

Anyway, a bit more plot and then we'll go over quotes because I have the whole book highlighted (well pretty much all of it). The next 10% or so is Cassidy lusting over Gage's body while sincerely denying that Ty could ever love her all while Ty continually tells Gage that Cassidy is "his". At 10% in, Tyler forces himself onto Cassidy.

Before he does that, Tyler visits Gage. 

I already hated thinking about what happened between Tyler and Cassidy, but having Tyler tell me he was about to go screw her made it that much worse. I'm sorry, not screw her, bang her. Like it was no big deal, just announced "I'm gonna go bang my girl." [from Gage's POV]

God, what is wrong with Tyler? How could anyone like this guy? This is disgusting especially since this is coming from a guy who supposedly loves Cassidy like a sister. Just disgusting. 

After that, Cassidy semi - smartly decides not to sleep in Ty's room like she always did before. So what does she do? She sleeps on the couch and then lets Gage pick her up and put her on his bed. She's not even scared when she wakes up on the bed of some guy she met a few weeks ago.

A bunch of random and un-noteworthy things happen (including Cassidy's eighteenth birthday). Let's examine some of these quotes shall we?

... there was no doubt in my mind I was in love with Cassidy. [Gage's POV]

First of all, what kind of sentence is that? I mean, does it make any sense to you? The second thing is that this is 12% into the book. Twelve percent and Gage is confessing his love.

I loved everything about him.
I loved him.

Sometimes, Sassy Gay Friend is the only way to express my feelings... *sigh*

I cook for six ridiculously obnoxious college guys while they take turns playing Xbox.

Why? Why the fuck do you do is Cassidy? You say hate doing it yet you do.

Ok, back to boring plot summaries. Gage and Cassidy sort of, kind of get together then Cassidy does something and Gage gets all macho man angry and dumps her. Cassidy gets all depressed cause "O NOES HE DON'T LIKE MEH".

Then Cassidy meets Gage again and they make up. Somehow. I really have no idea how that happened. If anyone figured this out, I'd be happy to add it in. One chapter Gage is like "RAWR SHE HATE ME" and Cassidy is practically mirroring that feeling, and in the next?

"Cassidy," I breathed.
She launched herself at me and wrapped her arms around my neck, whispering into my ear. 
"I missed you so much, Gage."

Uhhh.... kthen.

In a few pages, Cassidy has already attracted another guy who tries to force her into having sex. All I can say is, girl get yo rape whistle out. Doing his Travis Maddox thing, Gage goes and breaks Max's nose. Why do love interests need to break people's noses?

Is that cool or something?

Gage's pants get tighter a few dozen times and then Tyler tells Gage that Cassidy preformed oral sex to him and Gage goes insane. I think Tyler and Cassidy get together in this time but I'm not sure because Tyler kisses Cassidy all the time.

Like, pretty much every page but DON'T WORRY GUYS HE HAS NO ROMANTIC FEELINGS TOWARDS CASSIDY. 

-.-

Cassidy get's a job and everything is quiet for a bit before (yep there's always a before...) TYLER TRIES TO FUCKING RAPE HER. This part made me so angry. It wasn't the worst part in the book but, god, it was close. This time, he doesn't do anything that bad, but just wait ok?

Gage gets pissed and goes out whoring. He brings home a couple of girls and has sex with them (but there was this funny moment when he screamed out CASSIDY during sex and got slapped). What happens on the next page?

Tyler tries to, more forcefully this time, rape her. This is where I'm going to share a few of the GRRRR quotes.

"You'll enjoy it, Cassi. I promise."

Dear Tyler and other men out there like him, just because it's sex, doesn't mean people enjoy always enjoy it. You are forcing yourself upon a girl and just because you think, "she'll like it", doesn't mean it's not RAPE. R. A. P. E. RAPE. 

"You want this, Cassi, don't tell me you don't. Your little moans and sighs, and damn it, Cassi, you're wet as fuck. So why are you telling me to stop?" Tyler searched my face and shook his head slightly. "I swear to God, if you say you don't want this...."

THIS IS A LOVE INTEREST PEOPLE. HE'S NOT THE ANTAGONIST, HE'S THE FREAKING LOVE INTEREST. This is just sick, ok? There is absolutely no excuse for rape, and out of all the ones people tell the victim, this is the worst.

No. Just no.

Now, what does our favorite love interest do after he stops humping her? He goes out, gets drunk, and brings home a girl to have sex with. WHAT WHAT WHAT. NO. This is NOT ok. Ever. NO. Why are these guys going all Travis on me?

Cassidy goes into a rage and Tyler kicks her out of the house without phone or proper clothes. Cassidy almost dies of hypothermia before being saved by the amazing, strong, wonderful Gage. Once she warms up, Gage yells at her telling her that he's mad at her for being kicked out and almost dying.
ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?!?

Nothing happens for a while (except for Cassidy's friend trying to get her to date someone even though she's stringing along two other guys). Gage tells Cassidy that he loves her and she goes too. They go through that "OMG I THOUGHT YOU WOULD NEVA WANT MEH?" conversation.

Gage and Cassidy have lots and lots of sex everywhere (bed, shower, couch, and the kitchen table) and he calls Cassidy his girl around 15 times. Jesse is introduced and he's in lurve with Cassidy as well. I'm still trying to figure out what they all see in her.

Cassidy cooks for some guys and this is what one of them say to her:

"I want a damn SMB too! Doesn't matter if she thinks it's 'nothing fancy' or not, there isn't another SMB out there like Cassi. That's it, I'm kidnapping and keeping her." Jake sounded exasperated.
"What the hell is a SMB?" Ethan asked, but we all looked confused.
Jake looked at us like we should know this already. "SMB? Sandwich-Making Bitch."

What. The. Fuck.

But, wait, it gets better. 

Cassidy was wiping tears from her eyes when her laughs turned into soft giggles ... "And I didn't take it as offensive. It's like that whole women-belong-in-the-kitchen-barefoot-and-pregnant thing; it's funny."

GRRRRRR NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO IT'S NOT FUNNY AT ALL. IT'S DEMEANING AND ENTIRELY UN-FUNNY. 

After that, Cassidy basically turns into a sex addict and has sex everywhere. Gage hits some more people and accidentally hits Cassidy. She then finds out her old house had been burned down - yes, parent's house got burned down with them in it.

She leaves and meets Connor Green who she has an affair with. She then has the gall to confront Gage about his one night stand a few months ago. Whaaaa? Cassidy is also the one who says she doesn't trust guys.

Gage and Cassidy get together and Connor comes to ask Cassidy to go live with him. She declines and moves in with Gage. Turns out he made her a house and what do they do the moment they enter? Have sex. Then have more sex (ON THE KITCHEN ISLAND PEOPLE).

They get married; Cassidy almost dies (twice - scorpion bite and labor issues) and has three kids. The end. All I could get out by the end of the book was RAWR I HATE THIS. It was just terrible. Never, ever recommend. In fact run away.

Lisbeth is an American teenager who enjoys blowing shit up in videogames and discussing decapitation in great detail. She's also obsessed with Oceana, but you're not supposed to know that.