Thursday, September 5, 2013

{Review} Slated by Terri Terry

Title: Slated
Author: Terri Terry
Format: Library, hardcover
Publisher: Orchard Books
Date Read: July 12th through July 16th
Rating: ✭
DNF Review
Kyla’s memory has been erased,
her personality wiped blank,
her memories lost for ever.

She’s been Slated.

The government claims she was a terrorist and that they are giving her a second chance - as long as she plays by their rules. But echoes of the past whisper in Kyla’s mind. Someone is lying to her, and nothing is as it seems. Who can she trust in her search for the truth?

Slated is one of those books that sound great in theory but in actuality, it didn't end up that great. Reading the blurb made me extremely excited but the book however is the exact opposite. While there were many flaws to the novel, the major one was the fact that the book was written in the first person

To understand why this was a monumental fail on the author's part, you need to know something about the main character. Thankfully, this won't be a very long interruption because there isn't much to say about her.

Kayla is the main character who's traumatic backstory includes brain wash and stuff. Yeah, poor baby, .ect. Someone however forgot to tell Kayla that brainwash does not mean you become akin to say a robot or a door.

Actually no, there are robots and doors with more energy and vigour than her. She's worse. 

Kayla is seriously the most colorless, commonplace, dead, drab, drudging, dull, flat, ho hum, humdrum, insipid, interminable, irksome, lifeless, monotonous, moth-eaten, mundane, nothing, nowhere, platitudinous, plebeian, prosaic, repetitious, routine, spiritless, stale, stereotyped, stodgy, stuffy, stupid, tame, tedious, threadbare, tiresome, tiring, trite, unexciting, uninteresting, unvaried, vapid, wearisome (no I did not just copy the thesaurus entry for boring... heh) character out there. 

Consequently, the writing is the driest monotone out there and there is pretty much absolutely nothing to keep you going. Like, how am I supposed to stay awake interested when much of the book sounds like this:

‘Interesting choice for breakfast,’ Amy says, then sits up and yawns. ‘Are you an early bird?’
I look at her blankly.
‘Do you always wake up early?’
I consider. ‘I think so,’ I say, finally. ‘Though that could be because at the hospital you have no choice.’
‘Oh, I remember that. Horrible morning buzzer. Breakfast by six.’ She shudders.
‘Want one?’ I hold out the box.
‘Oooh, tempting. Maybe later, when I’m more awake. What is that?’ She points at the folder in my other hand.
‘My drawings.’
‘Can I see?’
I hesitate. I rarely show them to anyone, though Dr Lysander insisted on checking through them now and then.
‘You don’t have to show me if you don’t want to.’
I sit next to her and open the folder, pull out the sheets of paper. Amy exclaims at the one on top. A self-portrait. Me, but different: half as I am in the mirror, the other half skin missing, eyeball hanging from an empty socket.
‘May I?’ she holds out a hand, and I pass the drawing to her.
But that wasn’t on top before. I start flipping through the sheets.
‘You’re so good, this is amazing.’

This is an actual conversation from the book, by the way. This is actually how she sounds throughout the book.

Not even the plot could keep me going because honestly, it's extremely flat and boring. There isn't enough to really keep the story moving because all and any plot twists were easily guessed.

The author gives away all the clues in such a way that it becomes incredibly obvious. While sometimes hiding things in plain sight is great, it doesn't always work. Especially when you have little to no skill. World building is what readers look for and they remember it. If you put a crucial bit of information right in front of their eyes, they'll see it.

The whole cast of characters were bland, to put it lightly. They had little to no personality or distinguishing characteristics. Everyone talked in the same monotone as Kayla, except for one of the characters who had the bubbly manic pixie personality which is less of a personality and more of a stereotype, if you get what I mean.

So, the boring plot/characters and terrible writing joined forces to create one of the most dull stories I have ever read. I would not recommend this book to anyone and would advise you all to stay approximately 50 feet away at all times.

Lisbeth is an American teenager who enjoys blowing shit up in videogames and discussing decapitation in great detail. She's also obsessed with Oceana, but you're not supposed to know that.

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